Monday, November 06, 2006

:) and :( Looking back at Memphis

The End is Nigh. Of my assignment in Memphis. What started, amidst a bitch of a snowstorm in Feb, as a 6-week gig ended up going strong for 10 months. Extension followed extension, but this time the 01 Dec contract end date seems for real. To say that I'm ec-friggin-static would be putting it mildly! Weeks of using all conceivable strong-arm tactics (mainly twice-daily annoying visits to boss' cube and constant whining) to get me sent back home in time for Christmas seem to have worked. Which leaves me sitting pretty on (literally) the home stretch...

With less than a month to go, the mixed feelings are all over me like a bad rash.. so I thought why not stick them in your face (Or, as they say in Memphis: shove 'em in yo face, y'all!).

I know I won't miss...

  • certain people at work.

  • the shitty Indian food (I hate Indian restaurants in the US; How much??? - I've only been to 2 during my time in Memphis and only cause I couldn't lie and get out of it);

  • needing to bundle up under 6 layers before stepping out;

  • having no one give a shit when you're sick;

  • the obnoxious biyatch that (mis)manages our apartment building. She doesn't know her arse from a hole in the wall and yet struts around the place like she's the owner's daughter. Ok-fine, so she is the owner's daughter. She's still screwing the maintenance man and everyone knows it. So there!

  • not feeling totally safe in certain streets.. even when it's just 9 o'clock.. in the morning!;

  • the fact that one has to drive everywhere.. not enough places to walk to;

  • the hassle of carrying my passport everywhere I go;

  • my nemesis - static electricity. That guy you see flinching 4-6 times before daring to touch the door knob?.. yeah that's me;

  • chapped lips. And can someone PLEASE come up with a manly way for a guy to use chapstick?

  • the ironing board. I'm gonna hug my dhobi when I get back!!!!!!

  • the panhandlers on Main Street, creative as they are. The height was this dude wanting two bucks cause he was trying to get money together to take a cab. But why??? To get to the next town to find work!

But I will miss...
  • the Memphis Central Library... so much to give;
  • the Mississippi riverside with so many Sunday evenings spent there with a good book;
  • Gus' Fried Chicken, even though you couldn't hold a flaming piece of cold to a good tandoori;
  • the CASINOS... The Sheraton, The Grand, The Horseshoe and Gold Strike - I love you all without prejudice!!! You took my money. I took your booze. Fair deal;
  • MySpace.. having my very own apartment, burning the shit I cook, eating the shit I burn, watching World Series poker on TV just cause I can, letting the old newspapers stack up in the bathroom;
  • Certain people at work. Especially JLR, the funniest, coolest person I've ever worked with.
  • Lenny's subs (Classic Italian.. mmmm) and Quiznos;
  • Trivia night at the Flying Saucer. Despite my not contributing too much (I'm sorry, but I haven't the faintest idea how long the Mississippi is, which state the Sago mine disaster took place in or when the St. Louis Cardinals and the Detroit Tigers last met in the postseason!);
  • Cap'n Crunch. That's my favourite cereal. Just clarifying.
  • The clipclopclip of the horse carriages on Main Street.
  • Comedy Central. My portal to South Park, Scrubs, Family Guy and random standup. I don't watch too much TV but when I do, I like comedy... and I'd rather it not be "The Great Indian Laughter Challenge".

'Course I haven't looked back at every fragment of the last 10 months. But even though I may have missed out on a few pixels here and there, the bigger picture still remains a happy one.

*Retches upon reading corny picture analogy*

A Memphis sunset...